It started simple enough: Big Cat posted a photo captioned "You hate to see my boy go down like this," the kind of vague, ominous tweet that immediately tells you something went sideways for someone in the building.
You hate to see my boy go down like this
Turns out "something" was Jake Malasek's X account getting taken over and used to push a crypto trading scam, dream-car photos and all. Viva La Stool caught the actual hijacked post on screen, and it's about as textbook a scam tweet as you'll find, complete with a G-Wagen dressed up in ribbons like a giveaway prize.
Oh no! Jake Malasek has been hacked!!
Naturally, nobody at Barstool let this go quietly. Stoolies Clubhouse immediately started poking at the obvious question everyone asks when a coworker gets phished: what did this man click on? "I always would love to know the things the people who get hacked click on. Especially with a guy like Jake... What do we think it was?" they wrote, which is the group-chat equivalent of pouring salt in the wound.
The jokes kept escalating from there. Rico Bo$co floated a bit wondering if soccer legends Freddy Adu and Mia Hamm "put the hit out" on Malasek, and Stoolies Clubhouse followed up asking whether he'd actually "completed his cybersecurity awareness training." It's the classic office move: the second someone gets got, the whole building lines up to remind him about it.
Malasek got hacked “He seems to be very careless and it’s caught up with him” -Gruden
Even Gruden couldn't resist piling on from the podcast set, delivering the line that basically became the epitaph for this whole news cycle: Malasek "seems to be very careless and it's caught up with him." The Yak added its own two cents too, cracking that "our guy Malasek got .top'd" — a nod to the shady .top domain scammers love to use for these exact schemes.
By the afternoon, Rico Bo$co was treating it like a full-blown company emergency, tagging Big Cat directly with an "Alert!" post to make sure leadership was looped in on the chaos. Getting hacked isn't exactly rare in 2026, but getting hacked while working at a media company built entirely around clowning your coworkers in public is a special kind of unlucky. Malasek will get his account back eventually — the real punishment is that this is going in the Barstool bit rotation for the next year.