The Barstool Office Is Roasting Kelly Keegs' Arena Wedding In Real Time

The Billy Joel suggestion is somehow the funniest part. There's something deeply correct about picturing a Barstool wedding with the Piano Man doing a full set between the ceremony and the reception. Big Cat also briefly floated the wedding party walking out to Phish's "Divided Sky," which, credit where it's due, is actually a banger entrance song and a real thing someone should steal.

Gaz

@stoolsalesguy

Imagine driving down 7th avenue on your wedding day looking out your limousine window and seeing drug addict pan handlers to the left and Rico Bosco to your right. Really sets the tone.

That last one is peak New York City. The idea of looking out your wedding limo window and making eye contact with Rico Bosco on 7th Avenue is genuinely terrifying in a way that no other city on earth could deliver. At this point the roast has transcended the arena itself and become a meditation on what it means to get married in midtown Manhattan. Kelly Keegs wanted a big, memorable wedding. She's certainly getting one — just not entirely in the way she planned.