England needed extra time to finally shake Norway loose, and it took a Jude Bellingham brace to do it. The Three Lions trailed for most of the match before Bellingham dragged them level and then buried the go-ahead goal early in extra time, sending England to the semifinals and ending Norway's stunning run in the quarterfinals.
JUDE BELLINGHAM ITS COMING HOME
Barstool's timeline lit up in real time watching it unfold, with Haaland getting subbed off before the finish becoming its own subplot. Fans were furious watching him stand on the sideline with the tournament on the line, and the questions about the substitution ('WHY IS HAALAND NOT ON THE PITCH ANYMORE') outlasted the final whistle by hours. England, for its part, closed the match out by singing Wonderwall on the pitch, a full-circle nod to the same chant that's followed the Three Lions all summer.
But the real story of the week wasn't the scoreline, it was what happened after. Norway had never reached a World Cup quarterfinal before this run, having knocked out five-time champion Brazil to get there, and Haaland turned into a global phenomenon in the process, scoring 7 goals across the tournament. So when the team flew home, the country didn't treat it like an early exit. More than 100,000 people packed Oslo for an open-top bus parade, and the royal family turned out to greet the squad personally.
After losing to England in the Quarterfinals, the entire damn country of Norway showed up for a World Cup parade back home
It's the kind of celebration you'd expect for a trophy, not a quarterfinal loss, but that's the point. Norway hadn't been back to a World Cup in nearly three decades, and Haaland just made himself the most famous athlete in the country's history doing it. He reportedly had to peel off early to catch a rescheduled flight, which meant he actually missed the traditional 'Viking row' celebration with the royals in front of the palace.
That didn't stop the internet from turning his trip into its own bit. Barstool's account has been running a mini victory lap on Haaland's souvenir game, and the latest clip leans into the joke that he's basically gone full American at this point.
At this point Erling Haaland is an honorary American
England, meanwhile, moves on to face Argentina in Atlanta with a real shot at a second World Cup semifinal appearance in three tournaments. Norway goes home with no trophy but a new folk hero and a fan base that clearly doesn't need a title to show up. Both storylines are worth watching the rest of the way, one for the football, the other for whatever Haaland does with his newfound American souvenir collection.