Nicky Smokes can't shake Uncle Pat before ALDS Game 3

The trash talk started before 7am Central. Pat had apparently gone to bed with a lead, and Nicky Smokes wanted him to know about it.

Nicky Smokes

@nickysmokess

Good morning Uncle Pat! That 3 beer lead you had was cute. Hope this didn’t wake you up Unc! @OhioTate

Pat had already been up and moving. By the time the Tates boarded the Red Line for White Sox Dave's place, they had 4 cases of beer, red and navy cups, and a bag of Cubs peanuts with a Chief Wahoo logo laminated over it. Their marching orders were simple: every time anybody grabbed a beer, they grabbed one for Smokes too. If he wanted to out-drink the Tates, he was going to earn it.

That's a Cleveland family in Chicago for a home playoff game against Cleveland, with the White Sox up 2-0 in the ALDS. Smokes is a Sox guy, so this was never a friendly hang. It was a road game for one side and a house party for the other.

By mid-morning the old guys had a system. Dad, Uncle Pat and Uncle Russ were running what Tate called the 3 Man Weave on Smokes. When Nicky argued that a Fireball shot should count as a drink and put him ahead of Pat, the room voted it down 3-1. The punishment was another beer for the guy who had just said he needed a break.

Ohio’s Tate

@OhioTate

Dad, Uncle Pat, and Uncle Russ are running the 3 Man Weave on Nicky Smokes right now Nicky is trying to argue that his shot of Fireball put him up a drink on Pat That idea lost by a vote of 3-1 And it resulted in Nicky Smokes, who said he “needed a break”, getting another beer

Nicky's own read was that the old heads were cooking him in the paint with the fundamentals and he needed to turn it into a track meet. Over on The Yak, Big Cat had already picked a side, and it wasn't the young guy's.

Barstool Yak

@BarstoolYak

“That's a vet move by Tate's uncle to just lie about the amount of beers.” – Big Cat

0:33

Lying about the count only works if you can cover it, and Pat could. Around 10:40, Smokes found out he was down 2 and chugged back-to-back beers to get even. He got about one breath of celebrating.

Ohio’s Tate

@OhioTate

Credit to Nicky Smokes After finding out he was “down 2” to Uncle Pat, he chugged back-to-back beers to tie things back up “ALL SQUARE! ALL SQUARE!” Unfortunately Pat then finished his beer, and he is back up 1

Ohio’s Tate@OhioTate

Nicky Smokes has fallen 2 beers behind Uncle Pat before 10:30 am Credit to my Dad for pouring up another one for Smokes to catch up “There’s a lotta head though. Too much head” - Nicky Smokes “There’s no such thing as too much head” - Uncle Pat t.co/NKZDg4hYfW

Things moved to a Sox bar after that, where WSD bought a round of whiskey shots for the whole crew while the beers sat outside in the heat. By the Tates' count that was 8 beers each before 11:30. Tate signed off to enjoy the day with his family, and the rest went to the tailgate.

In the lot, a guy in a Bills hat had set up a folding table with a sign: $100 to your $20 that he could drink a beer faster than you. He beat challenger after challenger. Going by the clip, Smokes came closer than anyone, but almost doesn't pay.

Stoolies Clubhouse 🏴‍☠️

@StooliesClub

Smokes almost had him

Ronny Doitche@RonnyDoitche

Baseball #chicago

Then came the baseball, and it didn't go Nicky's way either. From the stands he blamed the Sox falling behind 4-1 on pulling a pitcher who was dealing, then slipped in his ad read anyway.

Nicky Smokes

@nickysmokess

Sox down 4-1 cause we sub out a pitcher whose shoving for two crumbs but at least we have @TickPick New customers get $20 off with promo code “STOOL20”

It finished Guardians 9, White Sox 3, so the Tates went home with the beer count, the bragging rights and the ballgame. The Sox still lead the best-of-5 series 2-1, and Game 4 is back in Chicago on Thursday. That gives Smokes one more home game to get even, as long as nobody tells Uncle Pat the score.