Barstool's timeline turned into a full group chat the second Spain and Belgium kicked off their World Cup quarterfinal, and by the time it ended the internet had a crying kid, a Dave Portnoy conspiracy theory about a mystery Belgian, and a pop star who apparently doesn't own a soccer jersey. Spain won it 2-1, punching their ticket to the semifinal against France, but this one earned its drama.
VAMOS! Spain strikes first vs. Belgium
Fabian Ruiz put Spain up 1-0 in the first half, and for a second it looked like business as usual for the favorites. Dave Portnoy was already needling Belgium before the ball even went in, calling the whole matchup embarrassing for his squad given who they were up against. But Belgium had other plans, clawing level before halftime and turning the broadcast into a genuine street fight.
BELGIUM ARE BACK LEVEL WITH SPAIN!
That equalizer flipped the whole vibe of the thread. Portnoy did a full 180, suddenly in awe of one particular Belgian bulldozing defenders in the box, insisting Spain was still the better team while also admitting the guy he wouldn't even name was a problem. He doubled down later, getting cryptic about it and taking a shot at anyone who didn't already know exactly who he meant. Big Cat, meanwhile, was bracing for the worst, wondering out loud what happens if Belgium somehow rides the same set piece to another goal.
It didn't happen. Mikel Merino came off the bench and delivered the dagger in the 87th minute, and the broadcast caught the whole sequence: a goalkeeper diving the wrong way, Spain's bench erupting, and Lamine Yamal embracing his new hero in real time.
SPAIN TAKES THE LEAD 🇪🇸🇪🇸🇪🇸
Portnoy was not thrilled with how it went down, ripping the Belgian keeper for what he called an awful rebound and an easy one to swallow. But the moment that actually broke containment had nothing to do with tactics. Cameras found a young Belgium fan wiping away tears in the stands right as the clock ticked toward full time, and it instantly became the defining image of the loss, with Barstool calling it a generational meme in its own right.
Belgium's run is over, but nobody's calling it a nothing tournament. This group had already produced a wild comeback earlier in the bracket, which is why Tommy Smokes signed off with a nod to that Senegal game rather than any bitterness about how it ended. Spain now moves on to face France in the semifinal, with Yamal, who turned heads all tournament and was reportedly named player of the match despite not scoring, again at the center of it.
And then there was Tate McRae. The pop star handled the ceremonial ball delivery before kickoff at the stadium in Inglewood, and Barstool's culture desk couldn't resist flagging it as its own little sideshow to the actual soccer. It's a very Barstool sequence of events: a legitimately great World Cup match, a viral crying-kid meme, and a completely unrelated pop star cameo, all fighting for the same timeline real estate within a few hours of each other.